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#NYC Success! Finally lost my virginity this weekend. Here’s what happened

I have struggled hopelessly with the issue of being a virgin for a very long time in my life.  The most action I had with a girl was getting a hug my junior year of high school

Fast-track forward, after 13 years of not being able to catch a break with any girl, not so much as a kiss, So i turned to this site for help and got a message from a girl who lives in the city. We’ve been seeing each other for almost 6 weeks and it is going amazingly well. At long last, we had sex last weekend.

I am writing this post purely to instill a bit of optimism in those who have been struggling for a long time. You may have a lot of worries in your head also about the experience of your ‘first time’. I had no idea what to expect, whether I would last long, or be able to make her orgasm. None of these things were an issue in the end, and we somehow had a two hour session!! She is a year older than me (28) and pretty experienced, having said that, I struggled to finish through penetration and she had to help me out at the end, but it was great.

I have a few things to say in terms of losing your virginity. Sex is part of having a ‘relationship’ with someone, and this is very easy to forget when you are obsessed with the social dilemma of ‘being a virgin’. Losing your virginity doesn’t change you, I’m the same guy I was last week.

Rather than focusing on sex, I would focus more on you. What are you doing with your life? Do you enjoy it? Are you happy? Think about these things. The way I saw it was: If I am unhappy, or desperate for sex, or nor doing anything particularly interesting in my life (work and/or free time), who is going to find those qualities desirable? Really try to look inward and realise who you are, and exploit that. Screw what anyone else thinks.

I felt insecure about my love of video games, non-commercial music tastes (soundtracks, jazz, progressive rock, tech metal), weird comedy and immature sense of humour. You start thinking “maybe I need to grow up”, “maybe I just don’t fit in with most people”. That is total bullshit. 99% of people are victims of social programming, indulging in barbaric nightlife, drinking and other ‘pop’ sensibilities. If that doesn’t sound like you, don’t sweat it. It just means there are fewer people out who you may have a connection with. That DOESN’T mean they don’t exist.

Just focus on living your own life and staying true to your own interests and desires. The more you can follow that path, the more likely you are to attract new people into your life who share something in common with you.

Excuse the rant. After all of my years of struggling and feeling like I would never be loved or find someone special in my life, I just wanted to contribute SOMETHING to this community, in hopes that someone might take a little a bit of inspiration